by RimPigFL - email@example.com - February 21 2005
Dinner that night at Tavern On The Green was a real family celebration. Dad got the waiter to bring us a bottle of champagne and, when it was served, Dad made a toast.
“To BJ and Cole. May you both finally find the happiness in each other that you’ve both always wanted. BJ, your Mom and I couldn’t be prouder of you if we tried and we can see that you are happier now than we’ve ever seen you.” Dad said.
We each clinked glasses and then we all drank. Cole grabbed the bottle from the ice bucket and passed it around the table. We all re-filled our glasses and then Cole cleared his throat. We all looked at him.
“I’d like to make a toast as well. To BJ, my favorite receiver, my best friend and my lover. Thank you for letting me be your lover and for forgiving me for all the hurt I caused you. And to you both,” he said, indicating my Mom and Dad, “for forgiving me as well and allowing me back into your family. I promise you all that I am going to spend the rest of my life doing anything I have to do to make BJ happy.”
We all drank again, though there were four sets of eyes that glistened with tears while we did. Finally, I grabbed the champagne and passed it around the table with each of us filling our glasses one more time.
“I want to offer a toast to someone who can’t be here tonight but I know is smiling down on us and happy that Cole and I have found each other again. To Justin.” I said, raising my class.
“To Justin!” Mom, Dad and Cole said together.
Cole reached out and put his hand over mine. I could see his ring gleaming on his hand. I reached over and covered it with mine, showing my ring as well. We smiled at each other. Cole then mouthed the words ‘I love you’.
“This time, I know what you said.” I smiled, remembering the night of the State Championship football game.
“I wondered if you’d remember.” Cole smiled.
“How could I forget. It was the first night we made love.” I said.
“When was that, dear?” my Mom asked.
I blushed, forgetting for the moment that my parents were sitting there. I opened my mouth but I couldn’t get anything to come out.
“It was the night of the State Football championship game.” Cole said.
My Mom looked at him questioningly.
“But, Cole, we knew you and BJ were sleeping together long before that!” she said.
I was turning a deeper shade of red. It was one thing to know that your parents knew about your sex life. It was an entirely different matter to discuss it with them!
“Yes, we were. For a very long time.” Cole said. “But that was the first time we ever really made love to each other. It was the first time we admitted to each other how we really felt.”
I was so grateful he could answer my Mom. I certainly couldn’t.
“Dear, I think you have just about embarrassed BJ to death.” my Dad told her gently.
“Oh, I’m sorry, BJ! I didn’t mean to, dear. It’s just always fascinated me how your two found each other so young.” my Mom said, stroking my arm.
I took a drink of champagne and found my voice.
“If you really want to know, Mom, Cole and I discovered sex and each other at the same time. I’d always loved him - as long as I’ve known him - but I thought it was just as a best friend and a brother. When I finally figured out how I really felt about him, I was scared to death! I didn’t want him to find out. I thought he would never talk to me again.” I said.
“And I thought the same thing!” Cole said. “I knew I was in love with him, but I was so scared of letting him know. I never figured he could feel the same way about me! And besides, after what I heard at home about ‘fags’, I fought it as hard as I could.”
“Yes, we saw that.” my Dad said. “We could see how you two felt about each other and how hard you were both trying to hide it from each other.”
“Yes, we wanted to badly to tell you both what was happening, but we knew we couldn’t.” my Mom said. “It was so painful to watch. But then everything changed. Ohh!”
“What?” I asked.
“I just remembered. It WAS after that football game that it changed! We could see that you both were not only in love with each other, but you both knew it finally!” Mom exclaimed.
“But what I want to know,” Dad said, “ is how you two got together again.”
“Cole called me.” I said.
“That was it?!” my Dad said.
“Well, not exactly. Cole called and wanted to talk to me. I knew what he’d been through over the last year and he sounded like he really needed me. I didn’t want to go, but I went. We talked. And the more we talked, the more I realized how much I still loved him and I knew he still loved me.” I told Dad.
“I hate to tell you that I was right, dear!” my Mom giggled.
“What do you mean, Mom?” I asked.
“You mother has always maintained that you and Cole belonged together. She has this idea that you two are ‘soul-mates’, destined to be together forever.” Dad rolled his eyes.
“I think she’s right.” I said.
“I sure hope she is!” Cole said.
“See, I told you so!” Mom crowed triumphantly.
“Okay. Okay. I do admit that you both do seemed to be meant to be together. God knows, you’ve both been through enough with each other. I will never understand love.” my Dad said.
“Of course not, Dad! You’re a straight male! Straight males are always clueless when it comes to love!” I giggled.
“You sound more and more like your mother every day.” Dad groused at me.
“Oh, come on, Dad! You know we love you and you love all of us, even if you do have trouble admitting it most of the time.” I giggled.
“Can we change the subject?” Dad said.
“We’re sorry, Dad. How about I tell you what Cole and I have been up to for the last couple of days?” I asked.
“I don’t think your mother and I need to hear the details of that.” Dad grinned.
“No, I don’t mean THAT!” I blushed again. “I”m talking about something else, something really exciting!”
“Ok, tell us.” Dad said.
So I told Dad and Mom about what we had done to Schuster and Callum. They were both very impressed by the story.
“So how long before the story breaks?” Dad asked.
“Day after tomorrow.” I said.
“Well, it’s a great story, son! So you’ve decided to stay with AP?” Dad asked.
“No, Dad. I’ve decided to leave. I don’t want to be gallivanting off all over the world anymore. I want to be here, with Cole.” I said, smiling at Cole.
“So what are you going to do?” Dad asked.
I looked back over at Cole. He nodded.
“I think Cole should tell you that.” I said to Dad.
And for the next half hour, Cole did exactly that. He told them all about the gym and his ideas for it. When he finished, my Dad looked at him and smiled.
“Cole, it sounds like you’ve really thought this out.” my Dad said.
“Yes, I have. I thought long and hard about what I really enjoyed in life. I was never happy as a lawyer, that was something my Dad insisted on.” Cole said.
“That’s why I never wanted BJ to be a lawyer. I knew it wasn’t what he really wanted to do. I’m sorry you went through so much, Cole, because of trying to get your father to love you. No son should ever have to ‘earn’ his father’s love. It should be there for him unconditionally.” my Dad said.
“The funny thing is,” Cole said quietly, “ you’re the only one that ever made me feel like I was loved as a son. You were the only ‘father’ that ever loved me and I repaid you by hurting you son. You were more of a father to me than mine ever was and I hurt you. I’m so very sorry.”
At this point, Cole’s head was hanging down so he couldn’t see my father’s face. First there was shock at Cole’s confession which I don’ t think Dad ever expected to hear but also there was a lot of anguish as he saw how badly Cole was hurting. I’d always known that my Dad loved Cole. When I was younger, I had even wondered if he didn’t somehow wish that Cole - the star quarterback - wasn’t his son instead of me. That was until I realized that Dad considered both of us his sons. And also realized that this is why Cole and my love for each other was so acceptable to him. He understood it from that viewpoint. Now here was Cole, the ‘prodigal son’ having returned and confessing his ‘sins’ to him and not just asking for his forgiveness but his love.
There was dead silence at the table as my mother and I looked at each other. I could see we both were unsure what my father would do. After all, this was a public place and Dad was never one to ‘make a scene’ in public. That’s why his actions were all the more shocking when they came.
Dad stood up and then literally knelt down on the floor next to Cole and took him in his arms. If my Dad had suddenly stripped and danced naked on the table, I don’t think I could have been more shocked. Cole leaned against my father and I could see the silent tears streaming down his face and could also see his shoulders shaking as my father held him.
“Cole...son, I have never stopped loving you. I knew how much you loved BJ and how much he loved you. I have always looked on you as another son. The same unconditional love that I’ve tried to give BJ was always yours. You didn’t even have to ask. I’m sorry I never told you this though. Maybe then your father’s threats wouldn’t have mattered to you. You would have known that you could have come to me and I would have taken care of you. I’m sorry, Cole. I should have told you.” Dad said quietly.
Cole looked up at my father’s face, I guess trying to judge if what he was saying was true or not. With the life he’d lead and the way that people had used him, I could well imagine that Cole had difficulty believing that someone other than me could love him just for himself. But this was my Dad, the man he’d known all his life. The man who was a second father to him. A man who had never lied to Cole. I also think that Cole’s guilt was almost somehow deeper when it came to Dad than to me. He had disappointed Dad and hurt him because of the way he’d treated me. I think Cole had always depended on my Dad’s love and respect and now he felt he’d lost those and could never get them back. I had taken him back, but we were lovers. We had that between us. But there was nothing he could offer Dad.
Finally, Coles face brightened. He must have finally realized that Dad did still love him with that unconditional love he had always given to both of us. Cole wrapped his arms around my Dad and they hugged. Dad leaned over and very gently kissed Cole on the forehead. The change that came over Cole was almost miraculous! It was like the weight of all his guilt and self-hatred was lifted off him. I had been wrong. I knew that Cole needed something beyond my love and forgiveness. I knew he needed the love and forgiveness that only a father can give. I had thought this impossible because Cole’s father would never have anything to do with him. I didn’t realize that it was my Dad’s love and forgiveness that Cole needed. I hadn’t realized how irrevokable the break with Cole’s own father was. Nor did I realize that Cole must have known that there was only one man who had ever truly loved him like a son, and that was my Dad.
They broke apart and Cole helped my Dad up off the floor. Neither my mother nor I said a word or acted as if anything out of the ordinary had happened. And when Dad called the waiter over and ordered another bottle of champagne, I didn’t notice the other signal that Dad gave the waiter for when the waiter brought the champagne, he was followed by another waiter pushing a linen covered trolley with a cake on top. The cake was covered in white icing with white roses and had Cole and my name spelled out in blue icing. I looked at Mom who shifted her eyes to my Dad, telling me who’s idea this was and who had arranged it. I looked at Dad who grinned at me.
“Well, what would a reception be without a wedding cake?” Dad said.
Cole grabbed my hand and in front of God, my parents and every one in Tavern on the Green, kissed me. Mom insisted that we cut the cake together and so we did. It was then I noticed that the cake was devil’s food rather than the traditional white cake. I glanced at Dad questioningly.
“You know neither of you like white cake and neither do I!” he announced and we all broke up laughing.
We drank more champagne and when we left, the waiter wrapped up the rest of the cake for us to take home. We drove back to the penthouse and Mom and Dad made noises about driving home but both Cole and I insisted that they at least come inside for coffee. They finally relented and came upstairs with us. I made coffee and served it outside on the roof garden. As the four of us sat under the stars, I finally felt that it was time for me to say some things that I had wanted to say all evening.
“Mom, Dad. I don’t know how to even begin to thank you for tonight.” I said.
“Well, it was the least we could do, son.” Dad said.
“No, Dad. I’m not talking about dinner and the cake and all, though those were wonderful. I want to thank you for everything you’ve been to us, to Cole and me. I want to thank you for loving us, even through the years when we couldn’t love each other. Tonight, as you have for all our lives, you gave Cole the most precious gift that one man can give another - a father’s love. I know you did that, in part, because of how much you love me. That you could accept the fact that I loved Cole, no matter what society felt about it, from the time that we were very young is the most precious gift you ever gave me. You both gave me.” I said, reaching over and putting my hand on Mom’s.
“But you both gave it to me twice. You opened your hearts to Justin as well and made him feel like he had a family, too. I wonder if you really know how much that meant to him? When he died in my arms, almost the last thing he said to me was how much he loved both of you and how grateful he was for your love. You were there the night he died. The two people who gave birth to him weren’t.” I said, feeling my eyes fill up with tears at the memory of that horrible night.
“I have been far luckier than any man deserves to be. I have been loved all my life by the best parents anyone could have and have been loved, as well, by two men who are beyond measure in what makes a man a worthwhile individual. Even as a writer, I have no adequate words to express how grateful I am to you both.” I said.
There was silence for a long time. My Mom leaned over and kissed me but nothing was said.
“Son, there is no reason for you to thank us.” my Dad’s voice broke the silence. “Loving your children is something that most parents do naturally, though not all.” he said, looking over at Cole. “But you must understand, we don’t deserve any thanks. You both have been such a joy in our lives. How we loved having you both around and watching both of you grow into men. Watching your love for each other grow was a beautiful, albeit painful, thing to watch as well. And even though I never thought I would see this night, it fills me with more joy to see you two back together than anything else I could think of. And I mean that!” Dad emphasized.
“Both of you know how much we love you.” Mom said. “Now that we know that you two are back together, we no longer have to worry about either one of you any more. Now you can worry about each other!”
And Mom laughed and so did the rest of us.
“Come on, dear. Let’s go home and leave these two alone. We’ve been to the reception, now we need to let them start the honeymoon.” Mom said to Dad.
“Knowing these two, the honeymoon never stopped!” Dad laughed and Cole and I blushed which made Dad laugh all the harder.
We followed them to the elevator but they insisted that we not go down with them to the garage. As the elevator descended, Cole took me in his arms.
“I’ve made a decision. I still know enough law to do what I should have done a long time ago.” Cole said.
“What’s that?” I asked.
“Change my name.” Cole said.
“To what?!” I asked, thinking Cole had taken leave of his senses!
“To yours.” he said and kissed me gently.
“We can’t both be BJ! It will be too confusing!” I insisted.
“Not my first name!” Cole grinned.
“Oh! Okay, sorry! Too much champagne!” I giggled. “So you’re the wife?”
“No. I’m not the wife! And neither are you. I’m not changing my name because we’re married, not that it’s a bad idea. No, I’m changing my name to yours because I’m now really a part of your family and I no longer want anything to do with the one I was born into.” Cole said and I could hear the decisiveness in his voice.
“Hey, wait a minute. This is starting to sound like we’re into incest here!” I joked.
Cole pulled me close and licked my neck up to my ear into which he whispered, “Well, they say incest is best!”.
“Mmm. I guess if we had been born brothers things would have ended up this way anyway.” I grinned.
“You betcha!” Cole grinned back. “So how about a little ‘brotherly love’, hmm?”
“Whatever you want, lover. Whatever you want!” I grinned.
And before I knew what happened, Cole had picked me up in his arms and literally carried me into the bedroom and laid me gently on the bed and then stood grinning down at me.
“Now who’s the wife?” he laughed.
“No fair! I could have carried you!” I growled.
“Ok, then to assuage your masculinity, you can fuck me first.” Cole grinned a wicked grin.
“Assuage my masculinity my ass! You just want to get fucked!” I grinned back.
“Well...so what if I do? That is why I fell in love with you in the first place. You had everything I wanted!” he grinned at me.
“What do you mean?” I asked, confused.
“You had a nice, warm hole to fuck and a nice big cock to suck and to fuck me with! Now what more could I ask for?” he laughed.
“Is that all I am to you, just a convenient hole and a cock?” I asked in mock indignation, sitting up on the bed cross-legged and crossing my arms over my chest.
“Oh, babe! You were more than convenient! You were down right insatiable!” he laughed.
“Well, I don’t know how I feel about that!” I said, secretly loving it because I could see the old Cole roaring back - all the cockiness and self-confidence re-emerging. And it was not only doing my heart good, it was turning me on to all hell!
“Ahh, come on, BJ! Admit it, man! You fell in love with my cock and ass, too!” he laughed.
I got up on my knees on the bed so that we were eye to eye.
“No, Cole. I didn’t. I love your ass and your cock, don’t get me wrong. But I fell in love with you. I fell in love with the cocky, dominating, infuriating male that you were. I fell in love with the boy who shared my bed and led me into things I wanted to do so badly but was afraid to try them. And I continued to fall in love with the man you were becoming before your fucking father all but destroyed him. And I’m falling in love all over again with this new Cole I’m seeing right now. Still the cocky and self-confident boy but a man, tempered by a lot of years of pain. You’re everything to me Cole. Everything I’ve ever wanted or needed. You’ve got to know that. I need you. I don’t just love you. Without you, my life is empty and barren. Without you, I don’t want to go on.” I said.
“Babe, what makes you think I could ever do without you? Look what happened when I tried. Do you know why I could be cocky and self-confident? Because you were always there with me. You were the rock I depended on to make things make sense in my life. I didn’t know that until I lost you. I truly wanted to die because I couldn’t figure out anyway to ever get you back. I figured you deserved better than me. That’s why I understood why you loved Justin. He treated you the way I should have. I truly never hated Justin. I was grateful to him. I was grateful that he took care of you and gave you what you needed when I was too stupid and cowardly to do it. As far as I’m concerned, I’m the luckiest man on earth. I’ve been given my life back. I’ve been given a second chance to love you and make you happy. I promise you I’m not going to blow it this time.” Cole said looking deep into my eyes.
This time there were no tears in his eyes. This time he wasn’t saying these things out of a sense of remorse but out of a sense of finally coming to a deeper understanding of himself. Cole was speaking from his heart out of strength, not weakness and I was so proud of him.
“If you’re not gonna blow it, does that mean you’re not gonna blow me?” I said quietly and we both broke up laughing.
“Hey! I’m the one who can’t take things being too serious, remember?” he laughed.
“Maybe we’ve loved each other so long, we’ve become like each other?” I suggested.
“God, I hope that’s true. I want to be more like you. I want to be more loving and caring. I want to be more considerate and supporting. I want to do all the things for you that you’ve always done for me and I was too stupid to see it.” Cole said, taking me in his arms and kissing me deeply.
I leaned back and pulled him down on the bed with me. We lay there in each others arms, lost in our own thoughts for a while, kissing each other gently and tenderly.
“Cole, can I ask you something?” I asked quietly.
“Uh,oh! Now what?” he grinned.
“What about Andrew?” I asked.
He took a breath.
“What about him?” Cole asked and I could hear the concern in his voice. He really didn’t want to talk about this.
“That’s what I want to know. What about him? Were you in love with him?” I asked.
“No. Never. The only person I’ve ever actually been in love with is you.” he said and I believed him.
“You know Andrew’s in love with you, don’t you?” I asked.
“Yeah. I know it. That became apparent the first time we had sex. I was hurtin’, hurtin’ bad. Everything in my life had collapsed and I was too scared to reach out to you. He was there and he wanted me. It felt good to be really wanted again. You know me! I never stopped to think about the consequences.” he said quietly.
“You said it yourself. You were in pain. You needed somebody. He wanted to be that somebody. It happens.” I said.
“Yeah. I didn’t want to hurt him! I didn’t want him fallin’ in love with me. I warned him. I told him I was still in love with you. In fact, I told him all about you. Told him what I’d done to you. I thought that was enough warning for him but it didn’t seem to help.” Cole said.
“When did it end?” I asked.
“Almost as soon as it started. More than a year ago. I only went to bed with him a couple of times. I saw what was happening and I cut it off. I wasn’t mean or cruel about it. But I told him that I just couldn’t handle him falling in love with me and me not feeling the same way about him.” Cole said.
“Do you think he’s gotten over you?” I asked.
“You saw him. What do you think?” Cole asked, his voice hard.
“I think he’s coming to terms with it. Seeing us together probably helped in some ways.” I said.
“I hope it did. I really like the guy, I really do! And if things were different, jumping his bones would be a definite option but that’s out of the question now.” Cole said.
“Why?” I asked.
“What do you mean, ‘why’? You know damned well ‘why’! I told you that I would never hurt you again and I meant it.” Cole said, almost angry.
“Are you saying that you want us to be monogamous to keep ME happy?!” I exclaimed.
“Well...yeah.” he said, but he seemed awfully unsure about the answer and he turned his head away.
“Cole...look at me.” I said, and he turned his head to face me. “Cole, I don’t want you staying physically faithful to me because you think it’s expected of you. If you want to be monogamous because YOU want to and because you don’t want to have sex with anybody but me, that’s fine. But don’t do it because you’re trying to protect me! That will never work! You’ll eventually end up resenting me or worse, doing it behind my back. I don’t want that. I want us to be totally honest with each other.” I said.
“Are you telling me that you don’t care if I have sex with another guy?!” Cole exclaimed.
“As long as you’re honest with me and tell me that you do, I have no problem with it.” I said calmly.
Cole just lay there staring at me for the longest time.
“I can’t believe you’re saying this. You’re the one who nearly left me when I fucked that girl at Justin’s place.” Cole said.
“Cole, that was a very long time ago. I’ve grown up a lot since then. Besides, what about all those nights with Vince and Micah?” I said, reminding him of our short lives in college together.
“Yeah, those were great.” he gave me a wolfish leer. “I have to admit, I loved fucking Micah but there was something that got me off even more.”
“What was that?” I asked.
“I never told you this because I didn’t know how you’d take it. You know how much I really loved watching Vince fuck you! What I never had the guts to do was to suck his load out of your butt. I don’t know why, I just couldn’t let myself go enough, I guess.” Cole said.
“Oh, fuck! I would have loved that!” I grinned.
“Ok, so what is this all leading up to?” Cole smirked at me. “I know you’ve got something in that devious journalist’s brain of yours!”
“Hey, look who’s talking, ‘Mr. Lawyer’!” I laughed.
“I’m not very much of a lawyer. I guess that’s why I got caught. But you’re a very successful journalist. You’re WAY more devious than I am!” Cole said with a grin.
“I just got the feeling that Andy might like to have a round with both of us.” I said blithely.
“Oh, you did, did you?!” Cole asked. “Did you bother to think about how I might feel about that?”
“No. You’re a fuckin’ horndog. You’d fuck anything that walks!” I laughed.
“Hey! I’m not like that! Well...not most of the time.” he admitted.
I laughed until tears almost came out of my eyes.
“Yes you are! But I did consider your feelings. Why do you think we’re having this conversation? I wanted to know how you felt about it before I invited him over.” I said.
He rolled over towards me and took me in his arms.
“BJ, I don’t want to do anything that might hurt you. I’ve done enough of that for one lifetime. Maybe more than one. Sure, I wouldn’t mind having sex with Andy. And, to tell you the truth, sex with another guy with you there is something that is so hot for me! I don’t know why, but it really turns me on seeing you gettin’ it on with another guy. But it’s not somethin’ that I feel comfortable initiating right now. Do you understand? If this is something that you want, I’m more than willing. But I don’t want you feelin’ like you have to for me. I can be very satisfied with just you.” Cole said.
“And I can be very satisfied with just you. You know that. But I like having sex with somebody else with you there, too. I guess I never admitted that to you before. When Vince would fuck me, I loved to watch you. You really loved it! I could tell, and it turned me on to no end!” I said.
“God! I wished you’d told me that! It would have made me feel a lot less guilty.” Cole said.
“Fuck guilt! Haven’t we both had enough of it? I think that we got this second chance to enjoy being lovers this time. At least that’s what I want to do. I have no fear of you leaving me and, by God!, you shouldn’t have any fear of me leaving you by this point.” I said looking into his eyes.
“No, I’m really not afraid of that now, babe.” he said and took my hand with the ring on it and kissed it. “This time I’ve marked my territory.” he grinned.
“Yeah, and you’re marked as mine!” I said kissing him gently on the lips.
“I just want you to know, however, that I did lie about one thing.” Cole said looking into my eyes.
“What?” I asked, concerned what this might be.
“I am gonna fuck you first!” Cole grinned.
“Okay.” I grinned back.
Our clothes flew off in several different directions and before I knew it, I was on my hands and knees on the bed and Cole had his face buried in my ass, his tongue all the way up me and I was moaning like a cheap whore! I loved the way Cole ate and fucked my butt. It was like he was a starving man and I was the first food he’d had in months! I could tell that Cole really loved my butt and he really loved me. I’d seen him with Micah in the old days and he didn’t do near the job eating Micah’s butt that he always did on mine. My mind went back for a minute to that night when Cole had fucked me for the very first time and we had both discovered the joy of eating each other’s asses.
When Cole judged that I was wet enough, he sat back and spit on his hand and began to lube his cock. I stayed on my hands and knees, expecting that this was the position Cole wanted to fuck me in but I was wrong.
“Turn over on your back.” his voice came, husky with desire. “I want to watch your face while I fuck you.”
I turned over, grinning at him and raised my legs and pulled them back with my hands so that he would have easy access to my hole. He took no time in grabbing my ankles and pushing his cockhead against my eager chute. He pressed forward and I willed my muscles to relax at the same time. He slowly slid into my butt until he could go no further and then he looked down at me. In his eyes, I saw the same look that I had that first night in that motel room after the state championship game when he had fucked me for the first time. That mixture of all out fuck-lust and deep love. Yes, Cole wanted to fuck me. He wanted to fuck me bad! He wanted to drill my ass with his cock and get off deep in my butt. But he wanted to do this, not just because he was horned. He wanted to do this because he loved me. He wanted to fuck me and only me at that moment.
“Fuck me, Cole. Make me yours all over again. You’re the quarterback, you call the play.” I grinned.
“Ahh, fuck! BJ! Man, how do you get in my fuckin’ head like that?! How did you know I was thinkin’ about the first time we did this?” Cole asked, his voice full of amazement.
“Because it was what I was thinking of. It’s what I’ve been thinking of most times that you fuck me on my back like this. It is one of the most wonderful memories that I have in life! The look of you, the feel of you fucking me that night and knowing that you loved me.” I said.
Cole took my legs and put them around his waist as he leaned his body over mine. He rested on his elbows, his cock buried in my butt, just like that first night. I reached up and gently slid my arms around his neck as he leaned down and kissed me deeply, tasting me and allowing me to suck and bite on his tongue.
“It’s never changed, man! It’s never changed! I can’t believe it. Every time I fuck you, it is just so amazing! I love fucking you more than anybody. I guess it’s because I love you more than anybody.” he murmured.
“And maybe because you know how much I love you?” I asked quietly.
“Oh, God! BJ! Do you remember the first night I sucked your cock?” he asked.
“Of course I do. It was the first night I sucked yours.” I said smiling.
“But there was something else that night. Something that meant way more to me than suckin’ your cock. I just could never tell you.” Cole whispered.
“What was it?” I asked.
“It was holding you in my arms when we were sleeping. I was so afraid you wouldn’t let me do it and I wanted to so bad! I needed to feel you in my arms. I didn’t really know why at the time. I guess somehow I knew deep down inside that I wanted you to belong to me and that was a way of showing you that need.” Cole murmured.
“I understood that. You scared me. I wasn’t sure how far you wanted to take things and I was so afraid that you’d find out just how much I loved you. Seems silly now, doesn’t it.” I whispered.
“It was always there, wasn’t it? We loved each other so much and we had such a hard time trying to hide it. Your Mom said it at dinner. It was so painful to watch us. I’ll bet it was - but not nearly as painful as to ‘be’ us.” Cole said.
“Cole...” I murmured.
“Yes, babe?” he answered.
“Fuck me. Please?” I begged.
He grinned and began fucking me. I groaned in ecstasy at the feeling of his cock sliding deep inside me and then out again. I looked up into his face and our eyes locked. I could see the depth of his love as I’m sure he could see mine. We moaned at each other, the feelings that were passing between us were too strong for words. We didn’t need words! Our bodies and our eyes spoke for us. All the love we had for each other got expressed as Cole continued to make love to me. Finally I couldn’t take it anymore.
“Cole! I’m gonna cum!” I moaned.
“Cum, babe! Cum for me! I need you so much!” Cole said as his hips slammed into me.
I cried out as my cum shot from my cock and covered both of us. I could feel his cock jerk several times in my butt and knew that he had shot his load deep inside me as well. He collapsed on top of me, his body covered with a fine sheen of sweat which I began to lick off every part of him my tongue could reach. I was surrounded by his raw male scent and I drank it in as deeply as I could through the deep breaths I was taking.
I realized, however, that I could hear Cole doing the same thing! I could hear him taking deep breaths of what had to be my scent. That was something else that never changed, we still love the scent of each other! I felt him licking at my throat and then his mouth was on mine, gentle, coaxing, sweetly drawing my lips into his mouth. The fact that Cole could be so amazingly gentle and loving never ceased to amaze me. One thing I was sure of, this side of him was one that he only showed to me.
I felt his softened cock finally slip from inside me. At that point, Cole rolled off me but pulled me over and into his arms, my head resting on one of his biceps. He leaned down and gently kissed me on the forehead and I moaned at the touch of his lips, remembering the first time he had ever done this.
“You remember, don’t you?” he murmured.
“Yes. It so amazed me then. You had never kissed me before.”
“Well, I had to do something. You just almost barfed on me from choking on my cock.” he chuckled low in his throat.
“I wanted it all.” I said, chuckling a little myself at the memory of that first hesitant blow-job I had given him.
“And you took it all, too! I was totally fucking amazed when you did!” he said.
“Just as I was when you kissed me.” I said.
“I wanted to do more, go further, really kiss you that night.” he said.
“I wanted to as well but I was too afraid. I didn’t think you could handle that.” I said.
“That was the first night you slept in my arms. I love having you here like this. This is what I missed the most. Not the sex, not even the kisses, though both of those are incredible. No, it was holding you like this, knowing that you were mine.” he said softly.
“This is what I missed most as well. Your arms around me, feeling so safe and secure. Knowing that you were with me and you wanted me.” I murmured.
“But you had Justin. Surely you slept in his arms, didn’t you?” he asked, his voice confused.
“Yes. And I loved Justin, I really did. There was just one problem.” I said.
“What was that?” he asked.
“It wasn’t you.” I said.
His arms tightened around me and his mouth sought mine in the darkness. He kissed me deeply and I could feel my body melding to his. It was like we were two halves of a whole, the perfect fit with each other.
“I love you, BJ.” he whispered as he released my lips from his.
“And I love you, Cole. But I lied.” I said.
“About what?” he asked.
“I’m not going to fuck you.” I chuckled. “I’m too tired. I just want to go to sleep in your arms. Can you wait until tomorrow morning? I’ll gladly fuck you then.”
“I can wait, lover. I waited ten years to be with you again. I can wait until morning.” he laughed and tightened his hold on me for just a moment.
I turned over in his arms so that he was spooned up against me, just like we had slept together as boys. And like that, we drifted off to sleep.