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Chapter Nine

December 2004

A strange and eerie realization slowly came over me. "You're right." I said. "What?" Kyle asked. "I do like Tanner." I said it more to myself than to Kyle. "Collin, I was just posing a theory, don't listen to me." Kyle said awkwardly. "I know, but it would explain a lot of things." I said. "Like what?" he asked. "Like why I keep thinking about him or why I get nervous around him or why I always give into him"it's why I don't want to tell him that I have a boyfriend." I said. "Are you sure? I thought you wanted him to leave you alone so that you could be happy with Tommy?" Kyle asked. "I do, but if I didn't like Tanner than I wouldn't need anyone to help me with him." "What about Tommy?" Kyle asked. I took in a long breath. "I need Tommy." I answered. "Do you still want me here for Tanner?" he asked. "No, you can go if you want." I said.

So Kyle went home, I told him not to tell Aubrey anything, and I sat on the couch contemplating what I was going to do about Tanner. I felt like I should tell him. I felt like I should truthfully explain why I couldn't be with him, but I couldn't do that to Tommy. I picked up the phone and dialed Tanners' cell. He answered. "Where are you?" I asked. "I'm on my way to your house. I'm sorry; I got caught up at the hospital and didn't realize what time it was." "It's cool, I was just wondering." I said. "I'm only a couple of minutes away, I'm coming down O'Connor right now." He said. "Okay, see you." I said. "Bye." He hung up.

I heard Tanner pull into my driveway a few minutes later. I was waiting at the door before he got there. I know, this just made me seem eager to see him, but I was a little on edge right now. He rang the door bell, and I don't know why, but I looked through the peep hole anyway. When I opened the door, a big smile spread across Tanners face. I smiled back at him. He was wearing a Rangers baseball cap, a white, sleeveless t-shirt, navy-blue shorts, and a pair of K-Swiss.

He stepped in and put his arms around me and kissed me. Why do things you know you shouldn't be doing feel so good? "So what is it that you have to talk to me about?" he asked. "Let's wait a minute. You thirsty, hungry?" I asked. "Whach'ya got to drink?" he asked. "Whatever you want." I said. We walked through the living room and to the kitchen. I leaned back against the counter as Tanner opened the fridge and grabbed a can of coke. "Come on, you're killing me. What is it that had you sounding so distraught on the phone yesterday?" he said taking a drink from the can. "I don't know how to say it. It's complicated." I said. "Am I gonna have to sit down?" he said mockingly. "Come on," I said, "let's sit outside." I turned on the pool lights and we walked outside and sat down on the patio.

"Okay, out with it." Tanner said. I waited a second, I didn't know how to say it and so I just pushed the words out. "I like you Tanner." That felt weird. Tanner smiled at me like I wasn't telling him anything he didn't already know. "Is that all?" he said. "But I have a boyfriend." I finally said. The words felt heavy, like their weight slowed down the realization of what they meant. Tanner stared at me, his eyes narrowed and he looked away. There it was again, the uncomfortable silence where you start to hear ringing in your ears. "Who?" he asked. I could hear the angry determination in his deep voice. "Tommy." I said. He looked up at me with a fierce look was in his eyes. "Tanner I'm sorry." I said lowly. "How long?" he asked me. "A few days." I said to him. "It happened the night of the party, after you left." "So you mean," He said, "you lied to me?" I nodded. "I asked you if anything was going on, why didn't you tell me?" he asked. "I couldn't after you told me how you felt" and after what had happened the night before." I said.

"So you're goin out with Tommy?" he said. I nodded. "But you also like me?" I nodded again. "What are you gonna do?" he said. "What do you mean?" I asked. "Obviously you don't like him enough to stay faithful, and obviously you like me enough to cheat on him. What are you gonna do?" "Tanner, I'm not going to choose between the two of you." "I'm not asking you to. I really do like you Collin and I want us to be together." He told me. "I'm sorry." I said shaking my head.

We were both quiet. "Please don't tell anyone about Tommy." I said. "Why would I tell anyone? If I outed Tommy then I would eventually have to out you too. I don't wanna do that." He said. "Are you mad at me?" I asked. "I am, but I still wanna be with you." I looked at him. "You do?" I asked. "Tommy Potter's not gonna keep me from getting what I want." He said. "You don't care that I'm with Tommy?" He shook his head, "I'm just gonna have to show you that I care more about you than he ever will." He said. "Tanner, this isn't a competition." I replied. "Collin, I've never really liked Tommy. I played on the team with him for almost two years and we never got along. I have no problem taking you away from him." He said in that angry/determined way again. I have to admit, the aggressiveness was hot. And sadly, I knew he was telling the truth.

"So what are you saying?" I asked. "If we like each other, why can't we be together?" He answered. "Because Tanner, I have a boyfriend, his name is Tommy remember?" I said. "What Tommy doesn't know isn't going to hurt him. Besides, that'll give you a chance to see who you really want to be with." He said. "But Tanner, I"" I started. He stood up and walked over to me. I got a little scared. "I am not going to take no for an answer Collin." He said firmly while looking down at me. I felt like a child being scolded by his father. He had me so turned on at this point. I stood up, but he is taller so I was still looking up and he was still looking down. He put his hands around my back and pulled me to him, then leaned down and kissed me. His hands moved inside my shirt and he slid his them up my sides. "Stop Tanner." I said. "What's the matter Collin, afraid you'll like it?" he whispered in my ear.

He put his lips on my lobe and slowly moved down to my neck; kissing and licking. He then he moved his hands down my skin and slid them inside my shorts, squeezing my ass. I didn't want to touch him and I think he could sense it because he grabbed my hands and put them on his chest. I finally gave in and put them underneath his shirt, settling my fingertips in the waist of his shorts. "Just don't call me Tommy again." He said smiling. Tanner pulled off his t-shirt, stripper style and threw it on the chair. His cap fell on me. "Keep this on." I said putting it back on his head as I sat against the table and began to rub my hands up and down his smooth abs and pecs. I looked up and found his deep blue eyes watching me. I smiled. "I hate the fact that you know how hot you are." I said. "Why?" he asked innocently. "Because you know how to use it on me." I said. He laughed and I felt his muscled torso contract and release. He leaned towards me. "What does that say about you? You're the one I'm fixin' to fuck the shit out of." He said. I didn't get a chance to reply. Tanner had his tongue in my mouth and was already undoing my shorts.

I felt his dick growing against me. Tanner pulled my shirt off and tossed it to the side. I reached down and squeezed his cock. "Mmmm"" he moaned in my mouth. He pulled away and watched me undo his shorts. "You're not wearing underwear." I said as his hard-on popped out. "I knew I was gonna see you today, so I decided to leave them off when I changed at work." He smiled wickedly. I thought about what Tommy had said last night, "Well, just hope he doesn't come over with the mentality that he's gonna get laid again." "You suck." I said to him. "Why?" Tanner asked. "You knew you were gonna get some coming over here, didn't you?" I said. He didn't say anything; he just proceeded to get me on the table. I laid back and raised my ass so that he could pull my underwear off. The table was cold.

I felt Tanner grab my dick and start jacking me off. I raised myself up on my elbows and saw him lower his mouth onto my throbbing member. I moaned as he took me all the way in. Feeling his warm mouth around me made ache all over. He looked into my eyes as he began deep throating my cock. "Ooooh"" I moaned. We had the eye contact going on for a while, it was a new thing for me. I usually felt uncomfortable looking into the eyes of the guy that had my dick in his mouth, but this was intense.

Tanner moved down and started licking along the crevice of my ass. I felt his long finger slide into me. It was a little unexpected, but felt good just the same. I grabbed his head by his hair and pulled him up to me. He grabbed my head and tuned it to the side as he began sucking and biting my neck. I was so entranced that I didn't feel his massive cock slide into me. Tanner lifted my legs up and held them to his chest as he eased his dick in and out of me. I was blanking in and out of all the moaning and pounding. Tanner got on the table, kneeling between my legs he pushed himself in again. He was holding himself up on his hands while he was thrusting. I reached up and put my hands on his sweaty chest. "Oh shit"Collin." Tanner grunted. I slid my hands around his back and down to his ass. I pulled him into me harder.

My dick was being rubbed in between our stomachs. Tanner leaned down to kiss me, the pressure from his stomach made my cock explode in spasms. Our bellies were soaked, and I soon felt the warm sensation reach my chest. With a few final thrusts and a loud moan, Tanner erupted inside of me, I could feel him convulse as his hot fluid coated my insides. Tanner and I laid on the table kissing, sweaty and cummy.

Tanner rolled off of me panting and leaned on his elbow. "You need a shower." He said to me as he ran his fingertips through the cum on my stomach. "Wanna come rub me down?" I asked. "Mmm, can I do more than that?" he asked, leaning over to kiss me.

After the shower, Tanner and I were sitting on the couch. I had my head on his lap as he was grazing his fingers along my bare chest. "You wanna know something else?" I asked him. "About what?" he said. "Me and Tommy." "Hmm." He mumbled. "I told him that we had sex." I said. "Which time?" Tanner asked. "All of them, well not really all of them. But I told him about us being together before we were going out, and after." Tanner looked down at me. "You told him that you cheated on him"with me?" he said smiling. I nodded my head. "That's awesome!" he exclaimed. "No it's not." I said sitting up. "Do you know what kind of hell I went through telling him?" "Well why did you say anything?" Tanner asked. "Have you ever cheated on someone that you really cared about?" I asked. "No," he said, "I would never cheat on you."

"Doesn't it bother you that I'm not all yours?" I asked. "I already told you, Collin. I'm gonna prove to you that I'm the one you should be with. It does blow that I'm gonna have to plan my time with you around Tommy's, but it's worth it. I just want you to realize that I want us to be together so much, I'm willing to put up with another guy so I can prove myself to you." He said. That hadn't occurred to me but now that I heard it, it dawned that I could actually have something with Tanner. "When did you realize you liked me?" he asked. I took a deep breath, "Well"" I told Tanner everything; from me telling him I couldn't see him anymore, to having Kyle pretend to be my boyfriend. "That's kinda fucked up." He said when I was through. "You were willing to do that to me for Tommy?" "Yeah." I answered. "Would you have done that for me?" he asked. "I don't know." I said.

Tanner let out a frustrated sigh, "Can't you tell him we're just friends?" he asked. "If I told him that, you and I would never be alone together." I said. He brought his right leg up on the couch and pulled me to him so that I was sitting between his legs with my back to his chest. Tanner leaned back and put his arms around me. Him holding me in the dark with his warm skin against me was soothing. "This is gonna be hard for me Tanner. I want to be with Tommy, but I don't want to let you go." I stroked his muscular arms. "And I'm sorry I'm doing this to you," he said, "but believe me, I wouldn't be doing it if I didn't feel we had something." I sat against him, feeling his breathing. "What did I get myself into?" I thought.

"Let's go have dinner." Tanner said. "Where?" I asked. "Anywhere"I don't care." He said to me. "You're not dressed to go anywhere good." I said to him. "We can stop at my place, before"and maybe after." He said. "You don't have to work tomorrow?" I asked. "I have second shift, so I don't go in till five. Why," he said, "do you have to see Tommy tomorrow?" "He said he was going to stop by after work." I said. "What time is that?" "I don't know" I said. "Well let's get goin. I'm hungry." He said.

I went upstairs to change but then I remembered I had to ring Tommy. I thought about what I was going to say. I picked up the phone and dialed his number. "Hey baby," I heard his sexy voice say when he answered. ""so how'd it go?" "Tanner didn't come?" I said. "Really? What happened?" he asked. "He had to stay at the hospital, couldn't make it." I replied. "Hospital? What for?" Tommy said. "He works there." I told him. "Oh"so what are you doing right now?" "I'm gonna go get me somethin to eat, then read over a patient file." I said. "Sounds like a lot of fun. So I'll see you tomorrow?" he said. "Yeah, what time do you get off work?" I asked. "Three, but uh"I'm gonna try to get off at two so I can spend more time with you." He said. "Why don't you spend the night?" I suggested. "But I have to work." Tommy said. "So bring your stuff over here, last time I heard I had a shower you could use and a bed you could sleep in." I said innocently. "Well, as long as you don't keep me up too late, I guess I can manage." He said with what I could tell was a smile. "I'm not making any promises." I said. "See you tomorrow babe." He said. "Bye."

I was in my closet; I put on some underwear, and was sliding my pants on when Tanner walked in my room. "What's taking you so long?" he asked. He leaned against the door frame and crossed his arms. I stopped and looked at him. My pants weren't zipped or buttoned and Tanner looked me over with a face that made me feel like I was going to be raped. "I know what I wanna have for dinner." He said. "NO." I said to him. He walked in, in a very domineering way. He grabbed me by the sides and pulled me to him; I could feel his bulge poking into me.

His hands moved around to my back as he slid them around my ass. "If you keep this up we're never going to get anywhere." I told him. "Aw, just a little appetizer." He pleaded. He put his hands inside my boxer-briefs and rubbed my ass. I looked into his eyes and shook my head. "I promise I'll make it quick." He said. I felt his cock swelling and he pulled me to him harder. "I don't want to take another shower." I said. "I'll keep it clean." He said smiling. "Damn you." I said. He leaned in and kissed me.

So after a failed attempt to control Tanner, and submissively giving him a deep and hardy blow-job, we got in his Jeep Cherokee and headed to his place.