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sometimes blue
DrewI am a thirty something married gay boy living in Sydney, almost on top of the gay scene but not in it! Why Sometimes blue?, because I love blue, but also I am sometimes blue :)
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Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Tension so thick you could cut it with a knife

The ongoing weirdness with my friend is continuing, and I have even made a serious attempt to offer an olive branch of reconciliation.

The friend just seems to stressed out, distant and on edge and I can't quite put my finger on the issue. I don't know whether it's work related (there is a lot going on there which is all very stressful), personal or a mix of everything.

I often wonder whether he reads my blog and has actually read posts where I have been cutting and quite nasty? Well this is my blog and I do use it form time to time to go through issues and get them from my head (which swirls enough) and into some jumble of words and emotions.

Anyway I seriously tried to ask if he was OK, the answer I got was yes from his mouth but a no from his body language. Then a moment later an 'I have to do something' and it's not the right time to talk'.

I do feel for him and no matter what I suppose I do want the friendship to repair itself. It will most likely never be quite what it once was, but I do want it to repair itself.

Looking back it's now almost three months since the offense occurred and as many times as I have wanted to tell him what happened I have chickened out every time.


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